Our Wedding Day, Part II: The Ceremony
The dark clouds that poured rain on us throughout the day and threatened to move our ceremony under the tent finally decided to recede just in time for guests to assemble on the lawn.
The Ceremony
As a violist and violinist, orchestral music is close to Sarah’s heart. The string quartet was made up of friends Joydita, Samara, Adriana, and Abe; all members of the Fusion String Ensemble that Sarah plays with regularly. Music for the ceremony was arranged for quartet by the group.
The Reverend Megan Snell led Graham to the altar. Rev. Megan is also a close friend of ours and is the pastor of the Nahant Village Church just outside of Boston.
Our Wedding Party PROCESSES
Wedding Party:
Sophie Mayer
Dillan DiGiovanni
Nicole Battaglia
Kim Douglas
Maddy Hirsch
Louisa Dunwiddie
Kayla Ramiscal
Lydia Cochrane
Lakshmi Datta
Erica Coray
Anne Kramer
Tina Danforth
Sarah processes with her parents, Stan and Mary Margaret.
“Take a moment and look out at all these people here to support you and love you.”
Readings
“To love is not to possess,
To own or imprison,
Nor to lose one’s self in another.
Love is to join and separate,
To walk alone and together,
To find a laughing freedom
That lonely isolation does not permit.
It is finally to be able
To be who we really are
No longer clinging in childish dependency
Nor docility living separate lives in silence,
It is to be perfectly one’s self
And perfectly joined in permanent commitment
To another–and to one’s inner self.
Love only endures when it moves like waves,
Receding and returning gently or passionately,
Or moving lovingly like the tide
In the moon’s own predictable harmony,
Because finally, despite a child’s scars
Or an adult’s deepest wounds,
They are openly free to be
Who they really are–and always secretly were,
In the very core of their being
Where true and lasting love can alone abide.”
Read by Graham’s Aunt, Kathryn Gerry Peel
“‘What is REAL?’ asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. ‘Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?’
’Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’
’Does it hurt?’ asked the Rabbit.
’Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. ‘When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.’
’Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,’ he asked, ‘or bit by bit?’
’It doesn’t happen all at once,’ said the Skin Horse. ``you become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.’
’I suppose you are real?’ said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse only smiled.
’Someone made me Real,’ he said. “That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can’t become unreal again. It lasts for always.”
Read by Best Man, Dillan DiGiovanni
“1. May the life you share together be as sweet as this wine you drink today. Blessed is the Source of Life, who created the fruit of the vine.
2. May your love for one another always be a source of inspiration and happiness. Blessed is the Source of Joy, who creates a wonderful, brilliant world.
3. May your journey together be blessed with generosity and forgiveness and may you enable each other to fulfill your dreams. Blessed is the Source of Generosity and Forgiveness who keeps you on the path of courage and hope.
4. Wherever you travel, and wherever life takes you, may the love of your family and friends always echo in your hearts…even across great distances and times. Blessed is the Source of Love who supports the edifice of love.
5. With the strength of your relationship, may you help transform the world in big ways and small ways. May your love for each other be a source of warmth and inspiration for your community. Blessed is the Source of Healing who brings wellbeing to the world through Her children.
6. May you always find a refuge tucked within your love – a place to hide out, and a place to reflect. Blessed is the Source of Safety, who brings joy to the couple.
7. Blessed is the Source of Life, who creates wonder, pleasure, song, and delight! May this couple be filled with gladness, and rejoicing, love, harmony, and companionship. And may they be blessed with lots and lots of peace! Blessed is the Source of Life, who is the Source of Peace.”
Read by Sarah’s Cousins, Louisa Dunwiddie and Maddy Hirsch
Our Vows
“I feel so lucky to be standing here with you, Graham.
You are loving, calm, and level-headed. You are creative, silly, and so generous with your time and your talents. You are the best problem solver.
In a lot of ways, we are opposites. You are calm while I’m anxious, you tend to expect the best while I expect the worse, you embrace change while I’m more apprehensive. But, we are similar in all the ways that matter. We both care deeply for our families and friends, we both like to travel and go on adventures, and we share the same priorities in terms of practical things like finances and future goals. Also, we share the same taste in home décor which you know is really important to me :)
The past almost 8 years have brought so much happiness and excitement. We have created a home for ourselves together in no less than six different apartments all over Boston, we have traveled everywhere from camping in Joshua Tree to driving our little rental Fiat across Portugal, and we have become dog parents to the best little guy. You consistently encourage me to see the good in everything, and to find happiness everywhere.
I know the future will bring struggles, but I have no doubt that we can get through anything with each other’s support, as we have in the past. I also know the future will bring so much love and adventure, from buying our first house, to raising children, and probably another dog in there somewhere. I’m looking forward to the excitement of more camping trips together, spontaneous date nights, and all the firsts we will experience together.
I promise to be by your side through it all – to support your goals, in your career and personally, to be a sounding board for tough decisions, to literally care for you in sickness. I promise lots of trips to IKEA, long walks with Murphy, and road trips. I promise to clean the kitchen if you cook dinner, and to close the kitchen cabinets if you forget. I promise to be your best friend, to never stop having fun together, and most of all to always be on the same team.
I promise to choose you every day, from now until forever. And if moving apartments so many times over the years has taught me anything, it’s taught me that change is constant, but so is our love and commitment to each other.”
“Every day I am inspired by you: by your spirit, your intellect, and your way of walking through the world.
I admire your curiosity and a love for learning. I admire your emotional intelligence and ability to communicate and express your thoughts and feelings.
And I admire how grounded you are in intentional values, thanks to a foundation of loving family and friends who have helped you blossom into a beautiful, caring, and dedicated person.
We have learned a lot in our years together. About ourselves, each other, who we are and who we can be. You’ve trusted me with your heart and made me a kinder and more thoughtful person in doing so. Thank you for loving me.
I know with all of my heart that I want to be your husband. And While we have an uncertain path ahead of us, I feel no fear. I know that whatever challenges we face, we will overcome them together. I know that any new beginning with you will be a step in the right direction.
And so today, in front of our friends and family, I declare my love and I make these promises to you:
I promise to support your growth and dreams—and to create together ever expanding dreams as our path unfolds.
I promise to laugh with you, dance with you, and always find moments of happiness in the everyday.
I promise to ease your little worries and to provide understanding and space for you to express your greatest concerns.
I promise to always be someone that you can trust and depend on, and to continuously strive to be worthy of your respect and love.
I promise to always make sure we’ve turned off the oven before leaving the house.
I promise to cherish and protect your heart.
And I promise to love you for the rest of my life.”
We did it!
Guests moved to the tent to drop off their chairs and begin the cocktail hour, dinner, and celebration!
